There has been a lot of different elements of change recently, and Emma has improved, even though she doesn’t think so.
Having her brother and sister home for a couple of weeks has given me a break from having to keep company with Emma and also relieve many of my daily errands and chores.
Emma enjoys their company, and they get on her case with humor and frustration, and empathize with me so I don’t feel so bad when I used to kick her out of the house instead of nurturing the broken spirit of Emma. They, too, do not let her feel sorry for herself and force her to go out of the house with them.
The biggest change has been that Emma has taken herself off of Geodon, and does not stand in the middle of the room or lie on her bed doing nothing. This has been a huge event, in my mind. Lights do not seem to bother her as much since she doesn’t go around shielding her eyes from ceiling lights anymore.
Emma was afraid to get off of anti-psychotics because she was afraid that things would look more scary to her, but so far, they do not. I feel that she is getting back to how she used to be – not so docile, some conceit, flashes of anger.
However, she is still far from being normal. She gets adamant about some issues, angry even. She seems to be getting more observant but still doesn’t care much about how she looks. She doesn’t bathe every day, or change her clothes. Even if we go out for short errands like Costco, she will wear the same baggy tshirt with oversize shorts, no makeup, stringy hair. Her skin looks bad, lots of breakouts, and she complains how hot it is and wants me to feel how sticky her skin is. Her bad skin may be the result of chelation – all the toxins coming out of her body, but I am not sure. She is not drinking as much water as she should be.
We tell her to bathe, to change her clothes, but she just doesn’t think it is important, so she doesn’t, or she will lie and say that she bathed already. She hasn’t put on makeup for weeks, and while she was once very very beautiful, she now looks so plain.
Sometimes she acts very childishly, and yet at times she is very funny and makes us all laugh. What is wrong with Emma? What can be done?