6th month, and it seems like years

When there is time and distance away from Emma, it is true bliss.

Emma is a bit less antagonistic towards me, and so am I towards her.  Sometimes we even have decent conversations, but they are very rare and fleeting.  And then she seems to forget about the decent conversations and starts spewing accusations towards me.

Her financial life is a train wreck – she used her 2 debit cards for small purchases and had $30 bank fees for overdraft for each incident!  Her accounts have now been closed and we paid off whatever was due.  She used up all of the limit on her credit card and bought $2000 worth of computer accessories and a new lap top.

She was checked into the hospital for emergency admissions to their mental health clinic twice.  The problem with that is those psychiatrists in charge do not really know her and her history and they “play” with the drugs.  Most of the time, they do not work and her reactions to those new drugs cause more psychosis rather than less.

Her psychiatrist, psychologist, case workers, friends, are at a loss of what to do for her.  As her mother, there is nothing left to give.

Ready to give up

I will not be posting too much since there is so much other stuff going on in my life right now.  My dear and wonderful husband is very ill and Emma is going off more and more at home.

She blames me for all of her woes, all of her poor decisions, and keeps saying how she is suicidal.  She uses her wiles and body to entice men who then feel so much compassion for her and they take her here and there, thinking that they can help her.

No one can help her better than herself, and she is unable to do that.  I was once her champion and willing to do anything to get her normal, but I have thrown in the towel.  I have no more to give her.  She has to realize that she is alone in this and not expect others to step up to the plate for her.

I am not sure how Emma’s situation will turn out.  She is certifiably mentally disabled and will get coverage and financial aid sometime soon.  Then, hopefully, she is out of our lives for good.